It's RODEO time in Houston, Y'all!

And this is a HUGE deal for us Houstonians.  This city will be all about this rodeo for the next 3 weeks.  And it is fun!  It is huge!  The entertainers are usually fabulous, though this year less fabulous because my guy, Keith Urban who I LOVE, will not be here.  I always get chute seats and am right on the ground and have had his sweat fly in my face as he raced by me during one show!

Anyway, "shaking head to clear mind" this blog is about the other male in my life!

Tate.

Ok.  So, rodeo time!  This past Friday was Go Texan Day!  It's the day before the big Rodeo Parade through downtown which is proceeded by the Rodeo Run.  The Thursday before starts the Chili Cook-Off which runs through Saturday night at Reliant Park/Stadium/Arena.  Chili Cook-Off sounds great doesn't it?  Well you have to know someone to get in, and when you do it's an absolute blast!  Great music, fantastic food, fabulous alcohol and tons of it and a down home root-tootin' good time!  I haven't been in a couple of years, and I miss it.

Go Texan Day calls for all us Houstonians to put on our boots, hats and all that western wear and just go all out!  Every school 'celebrates with Go Texan Day.  All around the city you'll see people in cowboy boots, spurs, western skirts, fringe, huge ass hats and dungarees!  Of course Tate's school had a Go Texan theme and along with it a Go Texan Day Picnic.  After Tate's swim lesson, where he floated on his back with NO assistance from Ms. V for at least 10 seconds....I was in shock, so proud and so excited; I almost couldn't believe my eyes!, we went over to the school for the picnic.  Hot dogs were passed around, chips, desserts and good ole Southern Sweet Tea.  Of course Tate ate some of the poppers chips I bought, one of his plain Greek yogurts and a piece of vegan cake I picked up for him at Whole Foods and nothing else.

 

I left Tate there for his nap, and he was actually smiling and giggling as he scampered off to be with his teacher.  I headed out for a much needed massage and eyebrow waxing appointment.  Bliss followed by a small ouch!  I then ran back to pick Tate up from daycare as soon as naptime/snack was over, so we could go watch the trail riders come in for the rodeo.  They make their last camp only about 1 mile from our house.  These riders have come from all over Texas making their way to the 21 day rodeo here in Houston.  Men, women and children from all over come to compete in our rodeo.  They have usually been riding several days.  Needless to say traffic in Houston is at a standstill as they make their way in.  We only saw the last three teams come in.  But I was very excited that 2 of the teams we saw were predominantly black teams!!  The Southwest Trail Riders followed by the Prairie View A&M riders.  What a glorious team of riders for my sweet boy to see!!  So often it seems like we African American Houstonians don't really get to participate in this rodeo, and certainly our numbers are small, but I was proud to see these two teams of riders gallop into camp.  The last team is the biggest team...1300 riders...the Salt Grass Trail Riders.  An old friend of mine rides in this group and lo and behold we saw her and got her attention!  

Tate had a fantastic time, waving and watching the rodeo clowns.  His favorite part by far though was the horses;  he talked about them the rest of the night.  Well, when he wasn't talking about his trains :)

Salt Grass Trail Riders.....

 

There's my friend, S, on the far right with her right hand on her hat!

Prairie View A&M Trail Riders.....

 

Rodeo Clown!

My little cowpoke!

First time on a covered wagon!

Henry and Edward enjoy the festivities

Southwest Trail Riders...

 

So excited about the horses!

It was a great afternoon!!  We made our way back home and Tate was just rambling on about the horses.  We're going to go to the rodeo again this year...the livestock show and the carnival.  He had alot of fun last year, and I'm sure this year will be no different.  

So, even if Keith Urban couldn't make it this year I'm know I'll have a fabulous time with this young man!!!

Love's Month

February 20, 2012  I love hearing him talk in his British accent!  "Here you go!" "Per-cy" (explanation later)
February 19, 2012  I love his unabashed thrill with the outdoors.  He had a blast at Bayou Bend today!
February 18, 2012  I love spending an entire day, just me and my son.
February 17, 2012  I love his complete joy with his trains, how he gets all the way down on the floor on his stomach and maneuvers all around the floor laughing and playing.
February 16, 2012  I love that he got to meet Uncle Jimmy.
February 15, 2012  I love how he is oblivious to the fact that he got candy yesterday for Valentine's Day! He was more excited with all the trains I got him!
February 14, 2012  I love that I got to spend Valentine's Day with the most incredible, amazing, funny, loving male I know.  

February 13, 2012  I love his beautiful curls!

February 12, 2012  I love how he handles disappointment so well sometimes.  The train and carousel were unavailable at the zoo today, but we still had a blast!


































February 11, 2012  I love watching him dance with his beloved grandparents.

February 10, 2012  I love how he remembers more than I imagined possible.   
February 9, 2012  I love the depth and beauty of his gorgeous eyes.

Memories, Regrets, Family and Love

Today is the one year anniversary of my dear Uncle Jimmy's, my mother's only brother, death.  He was diagnosed with Lymphoma over 10 years ago;  in fact when I did my half marathon in Bermuda with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society I was able to walk in honor of him.  He went into remission soon after my marathon in 2001, but the cancer returned with a vengenance  months before he passed.


Tate and I flew to NYC in June of 2010 to spend some time with my uncle, though mostly so he could meet his twin cousins who are one week older than him.  They are the children of my cousin Marcus.  His mom, Lynette, is sibling to my mom, my Uncle Jimmy, my Aunt Alice and my deceased Aunt Carolyn.


I will always be so grateful that Tate and I made that journey that summer.  Our contact with most of my mother's family has always been limited to her immediate family, so it was extremely important that Tate meet his cousins for me.  As well, I've always loved my Uncle Jimmy, and though I can't say I knew him well, certainly not like Marcus and his sister, Kim did, I love him.  He was funny, crass, outrageous and SUCH a New Yorker complete with cursing every other word, being standoffish to those he didn't know and oh he was not a fan of the white man.  He never forgot a birthday, never missed a graduation present, always sent Christmas cards and always included a little cash in all those cards.


A couple of nights before Tate and I returned home, my uncle came over to hang out with us.  Marcus and his wife (Gail) were going out that night to celebrate their anniversary, my Aunt Lynette was with her daughter, my other cousin who had just given birth in New Jersey and the twins were with Gail's family for the night.  Sadly, Tate was already asleep by the time Uncle Jimmy arrived, though he had seen him the day before and met him for his one and only time.  We ate some dinner, had some wine and then settled in the darkened living room with the tv on.  A friend of Jimmy's was there as well, and we just talked and reminisced a bit.  And I was exhausted.  Tate didn't sleep great in new environments, so I was not getting great sleep myself (nothing new :)  ).  And New Yorkers can stay up LATE.  I remember many a night hearing my mom and her family and friends up laughing, playing cards and having a fabulous time.  Up late!


Looking back on that last evening with my Uncle Jimmy, the last time I would ever see him, I feel a bit guilty.  Because all I wanted to do was to go to sleep.  I know I mentioned a couple of times how little sleep I was getting and how tired I was.  Yes, hints.  And now of course I regret it.  I wish I had been more engaged.  I wish I had been more aware.  I wish I had listened my intently.  I wish I had enjoyed our time together more.  I wish Tate had been a better sleeper.  I wish I had known.


I wish I had known it would be the last time I would see him.


I hope he knows I loved him, that I still love him.


All new mothers have regrets.  This is one of my biggest ones.


But we did spend about 2 1/2 hours together.  2 1/2 hours.  My uncle loved me and drove in bad traffic, quite a distance (Brooklyn to the Bronx) and did it twice that weekend.  This amidst him driving back and forth to New Jersey to be with my aunt and her daughter and the sad difficulties being experienced there, all in the 5 days we were in NYC.  He met my son, loved on him and enjoyed the short amount of time they had together.  Had I known it would be Tate's only time to see him, I would have let him stay up later and hang out with us.  But you know me and Tate's sleep.  He was in bed 'on time.'  


First time mother regrets.


But we learn.  


My Uncle Jimmy taught me that family is important, no matter how infrequently you see each other.  My Uncle Jimmy taught me that sons LOVE their mothers.  There was nothing more beautiful than watching my uncle with my beloved grandmother.  My Uncle Jimmy taught me to think outside the box.  My Uncle Jimmy taught me that you never know what's going to happen the next day, the next week, the next month or the next year.


Uncle Jimmy is going to teach Tate all those things and more.  Because I'll be sure Tate knows his Uncle Jimmy.  We need strong male figures to be role models in his life.  Just because Uncle Jimmy isn't alive to be a role model in no way means he can't still be one for his sweet nephew.  

Tate meets Uncle Jimmy for the 1st time June 2010

So I'll be scouring photo albums for pictures of my Uncle Jimmy as well as my grandparents and everyone else who has touched my life and is no longer here to personally touch Tate's life.  Tate's little family of two is about to get a whole lot bigger.


Thanks Uncle Jimmy!  I can't wait to hang out with you again, maybe this time you'll teach me how to play some cards.

Lindsey and Uncle Jimmy Summer 2007 - Brooklyn

The Greatest Love of All

My sweet boy will be awakened in about 30 minutes.  


Why?  Because this evening he leaned over to pick something up off the floor and hit his head on his way down on the a table in my parents' living room.  It's a stone table, with metal edges.  We're always really careful when we're in there trying to convince him not to run and being sure he's not playing around them.  Well, as usual I was sitting on the couch right there by him.  He leaned over and banged his little head.  He cried for about 5 minutes straight while I cuddled him and put some ice on his head.  It was a small, small bump (so much smaller than the one at daycare a couple of weeks ago).  It was an 'outy', so a good thing.  He then started playing and talking and wiggling around, no worse for the wear. 


Then he threw up.  10 minutes later.  Just about 2 tablespoons worth of vomit.


My heart sank.  I knew this required a call to the pediatrician as a visit to the ER may have been needed.


The nurse on call gave me instructions of what to look for over the next 72 hours.  Yes over the next 3 days.  3 days.


If he vomits again without a fever in the next 3 days we need to be seen.


If he acts disoriented or like he has a headache we need to be seen.


If he has drainage out of his ears or nose he needs to be seen.


I was also not to give him any pain meds for his head!  Good thing I hadn't given him the ibuprofen yet, because I was going to as soon as I hung up with her (that was my intent before she called, to alleviate some of the swelling and for pain relief)


I need to wake him 2 hours after he falls asleep tonight and then again 4 hours after he goes back to sleep.  Oh and waking him means getting him out of the crib and having him walk around.


All this for a small bump on the head, maybe 1/2 inch in diameter.  


So in 12 minutes I'll go in our room here at my parents' and gently wake my darling son and walk him around the room.  


As we said our prayers tonight I prayed for healing for my little boy.  I gave him lots of hugs and kisses and rocked him longer than usual.  He was asleep within minutes of my putting him in the crib with his beloved hippo and Sue-Y Bear.






Also today, Whitney Houston passed away.  She was only 48 years old.  When I look back or reminisce about the music of my youth, her music is a huge part of the soundtrack of my younger years.  I had all of her albums.  She had such an amazingly beautiful voice.  And she was black, probably one of the first black women I aspired to be like, look like.  Certainly Aretha Franklin, Dionne Warwick, Etta James, Diana Ross were famous black female singers, but there were very few young black singers my age when I grew up that I knew of.  I don't and never have listened to rap or hip/hop, so Queen Latifah was not in my realm of consciousness growing up.  Mariah Carey came along a few years later.  


But Whitney Houston was there.  Her music always touched my soul.  She always moved me to tears.  And like she has said, I have always believed music is love.  It really is.  


Music. Love.


I pray tonight that Whitney finds the peace and security she seems to have been in search of.  Of course, as only a fan I have no idea what she needed in this world, but I hope that whatever it was that she has now found it.  And I hope she's at peace as she goes on to meet our amazing Savior.  An true angel's voice sings in the chorus now.


THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kfs37zmBNRw&feature=related

Oh my goodness!!!  I'm just finding 2 1/2 to be so much fun!!  I mean really really fun.  Tate is just so funny, outgoing, smart, cute, loving and relatively easy-going that I just want to eat him up.  I want to hug him and cuddle him all the time with all the joy in my heart in being allowed the precious gift of being his mother.  He's just so much...everything.  Our evenings are less frantic now that I'm letting him stay up until 7:30.  So he finishes dinner and scampers off into the living room to play with his trains HAPPILY and I get his dinner and school day dishes cleaned up in a jiff.  And I still have time to go hang out with him on the floor for 15-20 minutes.  We read, play trains or play trains :)  I even get to pet the cat for a bit!!  Yay for Vinnie!!  Used to be that he's finish eating and we'd basically then go upstairs to start our bedtime routine.  He would be in the crib by 7/7:15, then I would come downstairs and have to clean up the dinner dishes and get his school stuff cleaned up as well.  THEN I would make myself something to eat and have to clean that up.  Just having these 15 minutes together to reconnect is just amazing.  I know I've also been blessed that Tate is really easy when we get home.  He rarely melts down or any of the such, and really never has.  Possibly that's because I've always, always had dinner ready to go, so there's never any downtime from when we walk in the door to when we eat of more than 5 minutes.  Of course we have had our moments, but luckily so far they have been very few and far between.


So we've got a new routine and have been doing it for the past couple of weeks.  We still get home around 5:40. I heat up his dinner plate while he takes off his shoes and plays for a few minutes.  Then he eats and I sit with him while we skype with my parents.  He does eat pretty quick and that's because he is antsy to go play with Thomas and Henry, the trains :)  He's done in 15-20 minutes.  I clean up, load the dishwasher, empty his lunch box items into the dishwasher and then join him in the living room for some run.  Around 6:30 I tell him it's time to head upstairs with his trains, Sue-Y Bear and hippo and he amazingly happily runs up the stairs.  As soon as we're in our room, he's on the floor with his trains while I get the bath water running, sometimes start a load of laundry or put clothes away.  And our nighttime routine begins.  It's a slower pace and we really get to enjoy each other.  He's still up at the crack of dawn, but he wakes up happy and smiling.  He still naps well at home and at daycare most days, so I think he's getting the sleep he needs.  I'm soooo protective of his sleep, but I think I'm doing well on that front because I don't get the 'witching hour'.  (so far :) )


So 30 months with Tate...so amazing.  Many ups.  Many downs.  Little people tantrums.  Big people tantrums.  Lots of smiles.  Loads of hugs.  Tons of cuddles.  Oodles of kisses.  Thousands of "I love yous" and a lifetime of togetherness.  It just doesn't get any better.

It's very hard to hear, but he is just a-singing away!  He's crooning "The Little Drummer Boy" while playing by himself with those much-adored trains.  If you listen closely you can hear some familiar verses from "Pa-Rum-Pum-Pum-Pum" to "The ox and lamb kept time" to "...to lay before the king" And at the very end you can definitely hear "Then he smiled at me, pa-rum-pum-pum-pum, me and my drum..."  

There are other bits and pieces as well. Enjoy!

February 8, 2012  I love that his teacher, Ms. L, is always telling me how smart Tate is
February 7, 2012  I love listening him read his books to me..he loves to read "Green Eggs and Ham"
February 6, 2012  I love that he loves taking medicine
February 5, 2012  I love spending the day just the 2 of us, noone else, doing a whole lot of nothing, together.
February 4, 2012  I love that Tate is such a sound sleeper that the cackling, laughs and hoopla going on downstairs during my slumber party didn't wake him at all.
February 3, 2012  I love how he just takes to the water when he's swimming
February 2, 2012   I love that he can now take all his clothes off except his shirts and he can put on socks, pants and a pull-up.
February 1, 2012  I love how music touches his soul;  he cried again today watching Andre Bocelli sing to Elmo
January 31, 2012  I love watching his enthusiasm for his trains and everything else in his life that he enjoys
January 30, 2012  I love that teeny tiny chip that he has on the mesio-incisal edge of Tooth #E that he got when he was about 9 months old.
January 29, 2012  I love how precious and perfectly soft his skin is.
January 28, 2012  I love those sweet lips and how he gives perfect kisses with them.
January 27, 2012  I love that he has his grandmother wrapped around his fingers...he refused to go to swim lessons or daycare today and she was more than happy to hang out with him all day while I worked.

Oh My...

Oh my GOSH! says Tate!


Oh my Good-ness! squeals Tate!


I love it!  Just love his excitement and his joy!  His love of life!  




And then the added bonus of...


Oh Shit!  screeches Tate
As I race our car down our street back to Whole Foods where I'd left my purse on the ground, in the parking lot.  I've said that word one time.  One time.  And that he opts to say with no problems the first time he hears it.  With perfect pitch, tone and usage.


Oh Shit!


Thank goodness people are honest and caring.  A very nice gentleman found my purse in the parking lot and turned it into Guest Services.  


I am blessed.


Oh yeah!!

Then and Now

One week later.......

 

Tate has done amazingly well without his pacifier.  Amazingly.  He has not asked for it one time.  Not one time.  We started with Sue-Y Bear last Saturday when we returned from Build-a-Bear and he hasn't looked back.  AND he still wants his hippo!  The trains are a close second, and many times they are first, but he asks for hippo and Sue-Y Bear at night and at naptime.

He took his normal length naps on Saturday and Sunday.  Monday he did refuse to nap at all.  But he never once cried in his diatribe about not wanting to nap that went on for 1 hour and 27 minutes.  That night he was asleep at 6:10pm.

Sunday and Monday morning did find him up and crying at 4am.  He just wasn't able to go back to sleep when he 'woke' during that last sleep cycle, so I just put him in bed with me both nights, and he went right back to sleep.

Tuesday he was back at daycare where he hasn't had a pacifier since March of 2010. (Seriously)  Tuesday and Wednesday morning he woke at his normal time between 5 and 530am.  

But Wednesday and Thursday night were absolute hell.  

Wednesday night he woke up at 11:30pm screaming and crying hysterically.  It was a shock.  It was awful.  I jumped up to get him out of the crib to rock him, sleep with him, hold him.  Nothing worked.  He just wailed and wailed.  I wondered if he was having a nightmare, but it seemed like he was looking right at me.  I kept saying 'what's wrong?' 'does something hurt?' 'do you want something?'  No success.  No answers, just continued horrific crying.  Finally he lay down about an hour later with me and drifted back to sleep, but a horrible, fitful, kicking me sleep.   But he woke at 1:50am again upset and wailing.  This time the middle of the night tantrum only lasted about 30 minutes and he went back to sleep.  However, his sleeping was so fitful I didn't rest much at all.  

At 5:23am I heard "I'm finished with bedtime, Mommy."  A little pat on my back "Mommy I'm finished.  I'm finished with bedtime."  With a big smile on his sweet face.

Thursday night was even worse.  I climbed into bed at 10:10 and he was up screaming at 10:20.  And this went on until 11:55.  Crying, wailing, flailing about on the bed.  Me absolutely exhausted at the end of my rope.  I offered cheerios, milk, watching 'Thomas' on tv, playing with my phone, yogurt raisins, reading books and......the sue-y.  Yes the pacifier.  I was lost.

He wanted none of it, and in this almost 2 hour period of flailing about, laying down and moving all over the bed, me turning away from him, him laying sideways and kicking me, thrusting arms in my face, constant commotion wherein I laid still for about 10 minutes, and he absolutely refused to let me cuddle him in any way, shape or form.  Finally, I put his little face right in front of mine while he was hollering and hollered right in his face, so loud my throat hurt the next day, "WHAT DO YOU WAAANNNTTT???"  He was horrified.  He startled.  And then threw his arms around me and sobbed.  I started crying as well.  It was just horrendous.

I asked him again if he wanted some cheerios.  He hiccuped out the word 'yes.'  I gave him his Sue-Y Bear and his hippo and told him I would be right back.  I ran downstairs and got the cheerios and a sippy of water.  I climbed back in bed with him and opened up the ziploc of cheerios and offered it to him to hold.  He was shaking so hard he couldn't open the bag and couldn't even pick up the cheerios with me holding the bag.  My poor baby.  And this really worried me and elicited more tears from him.  I fed him the cheerios.  He sucked down some water and asked for more Cheerios.  I ran downstairs and got some more.  Then we laid down to sleep, him in my arms.  (and yes I brushed his teeth again :) )  But he was up again crying at 4.  More kicking and flailing about, and it last for a good 30 minutes.  Nothing I did helped.  He did finally lay down, but was moving all about, so I spent the next hour just dozing and every time he moved checking to make sure he didn't fall out of the bed.  Though I have rails on my bed he was moving in such a manner that he practically lifted himself up many times as he manuevered around the bed.  Thankfully my mom was staying with him Friday, so we were able to sleep in a bit since I didn't have to give him breakfast, dress him and get him to daycare.  But 6:30 came really early when I'd only slept maybe 3 1/2 hours and not in a row.

And he was fine and happy as a clam when he woke up both mornings.  I started to wonder if he has an ear infection, but he has tubes, and I've seen no drainage.  He has absolutely no fever.

Yesterday he started coughing and being congested.  Green gunk in his nose.  I had stopped his zyrtec about 3 weeks ago because the weather was better and he wasn't seeming congested, though I continued his Singulair.  

So, is he getting sick?  He acts absolutely fine during the daytime.  He took a great nap yesterday for my mom.  He was asleep last night by 7:30 and THEN he slept until 6:04 this morning.  Around midnight he cried out for about 2-3 minutes, but went right back to sleep.  That was it.

He has been coughing today, but the cough isn't nearly as productive as it was yesterday.  And it's not croupy at all.  The congestion seems better, and his nose is running clear and isn't nearly as gunky.  However, now at 1040pm his cough has been dry, not quite hacking.  And has been like that for the past 6-8 hours.  It's not keeping him awake, though he does have some spurts where he coughs every 2-3 minutes while he's up there sleeping.  He went down pretty easily tonight as well, though didn't fall asleep until closer to 8.  But that's because he took an almost 2 hour nap today and didn't wake until after 2pm.  However, he was more than happy to be in his crib at 7:30.

So,  now I guess I wait.  I'm running the humidifier;  we have a warm mist one after using a cool mist one for quite some time with no real results.   I pray he's not getting sick.  I pray that this dry cough is not a symptom of asthma.  One of our allergists has recommended that we start allergy shots when he turns 3 to help prevent the atopic march...eczema--->allergies--->asthma.  We are at allergies; we want to stop before asthma hits because that's a horrid disease and the treatment is worse;  the long term effects are ones I don't want to even consider.

So, I'm going to head off to bed to hopefully get some sleep.  He hasn't coughed now in about 15 minutes, but I'm worried that he will be off and on all night.  Of course that means my sleep will be disrupted just as his is.  My sweet boy. Such a trooper.

Oh and he's never once asked for his sue-y.  

Where did my baby go???

THEN

NOW