Easter 2013

Tate and I spent a relatively low key Easter weekend together, and it's just what  I needed.  The rest, recuperation, reflection and refuge of our home.

Thursday his little school had their Easter Egg Hunt and Easter parties.  I took Tate in around 8:30 and went home to rest (goodness was I exhausted by then!) then came back to watch his class to their egg hunt.  They had pizza for lunch, a rare treat and then cupcakes (I of course had to run to Whole Foods to get a slice of egg free cake for sweet Tate :) )

Good Friday was nice and quiet.  We joined Aunt Lindsey for lunch and we just hung out all day!  

Saturday morning we slept in!  Until 7!!  I'm not having Tate nap at home
unless he asks to!  :)  So he's asleep by 7:30 and stirs around 6:15am, but quickly turns over and sleeps for another hour or so.  Ok, so he's done it 3 times, but those 3 times were absolute bliss for me!  We ran to the grocery store to prepare for Sunday's dinner where we met another Easter Bunny!!  This one had a Texan flair!

We then came home for lunch then headed out to do our favorite weekend activity!  Ride the train at the zoo!  It was a gorgeous day!!

Sunday morning The Easter Bunny came bright and early!  Tate had seen this Pluto at our friend's house on St. Patrick's Day and thankfully shared with me that he'd like one.  I in turn shared that tidbit of information with the Easter Bunny.

Tate had fun rummaging in his Easter basket!  There were even a few pieces of candy to be found!!

Vincent got in on the action as well.  I suppose
I should get him a basket next year! 

After breakfast we headed off to church.  Early.  45 minutes early.  I decided I wanted to go to the big Rite II service in the church itself, not the children's service in the PLC.  Our Easter service in the church is just beautiful and I absolutely love it.  When the procession starts down the aisle singing "Crown Him with Many Crowns" I'm usually almost in tears of joy.  And when we sing "I Am The Bread of Life" during communion I am overcome with emotion; even writing this right now brings me to tears.  

The Rite II service is long though on Easter Sunday and packed.  And it's not quite child friendly.  My friend came with her husband and newly turned 4 year old daughter, and we sat together.   The kids were absolutely amazing.  No tears, just a few squirms and asking when it was going to be over, but they were great!  

Alleluia! Christ is Risen!

There is a huge Egg Hunt on the lawn of the church after this service complete with about 5000 eggs!  We headed on over and Tate and H had a blast!

Yep!  I even let him have a piece
of candy right away!!

We came home and had some lunch and hung out for a bit, then my entire family joined us for an afternoon of family, love, basketball (March Madness...sigh), playing outside and just joy.  I'm so blessed that our family is not splintered like so many other families I hear about all. the. time.  We don't all get along all the time; ok that's an understatement, but we're a family.  A family that stays together.  A family that spends time together.  A family that doesn't turn their back on each other.  I'm pretty proud of us for the way we stick together.  

Tate, my mommy and my nephews

Happy Easter!

Counting Our Blessings

On this very Holy day I'm counting my blessings....

...Jesus gave up His life for me and my son.  Sunday's comin'.  I'm prayerfully waiting for Sunday.

....My sweet boy came home on Wednesday evening.  My parents had taken him to daycare that morning with stern instructions to me that if I didn't feel up to having him I was to call and let them pick him up and take him back to their house.  

I couldn't wait to have him back with me.  His pediatrician and her nurse said it was fine, that he was already exposed and that if I felt up to it, to bring the baby home.  I brought my baby home.  And yes it exhausted me to have him here.  But it was worth that huge huge smile and laughter as he raced to me when I picked him up at 5pm screaming "MOMMY!!!!"  As soon as he was in bed, I was in bed.  Thursday I took him to daycare all day as well, and I recuperated more.

...I'm feeling better.  So much better.  I'm still so very tired, but 200% better than I was last week at this time.

...I am surrounded by love.  My family has been absolutely amazing.  Amazing.  My parents have just been so awesome.  There are actually no words that express my gratitude to them.  And my friends and sister too...running around all hours of the night to get me my meds, going out of their ways to bring me food, drink and other meds.  I am blessed.

...Tate can entertain himself seemingly for hours.  This morning he played trains and colored by himself for an hour and 15 minutes while I folded a load of laundry upstairs and laid on the rocking chair to rest.  He continued his awesome behavior of playing trains while I sat on the floor this afternoon and he just moved around me for over an hour.  Goodness I love him.

...And it's Friday night.  And it's 9pm.  And I'm going to bed.

Blessed.

Lunch today with Aunt Lindsey!

Separated

For the first time in 3 years 8 months and 2 days I am sitting in my bed, in my bedroom, with the television on.  Alone.  

Because I am seriously ill.

Tate is with his grandparents and has been since Sunday morning around 10am.

On Friday afternoon I had a massage, and I was really chilled during most of it and my nose was beyond congested.  I chalked it up to maybe the bed warmer wasn't on high enough and I always gets congested laying on my stomach while she works on my back.  When I was done, I was still cold and a bit tired, but I just blew it off.

I picked Tate up from school and we did our normal Friday stuff, trains, books, Zingo, dinner, bath, books, teeth and bed.  I'm sure y'all remember me saying I was exhausted and that I rocked him to sleep :)  I climbed into bed with him soon after that post.

And woke up around 3am with a fever of 101.86.

With Tate right next to me.

Mi-ser-able.

I downed 4 Advil and slept fitfully.

We were up at 6...ugh.  

Somehow I made it without taking out too much of my feeling poorly on sweet Tate.  We had plans to meet one of his little schoolmates and her mama to see the Easter Bunny and for lunch.  So I downed 3 more Advil at 9am and we headed out.

Those happy faces were worth it :)

We even went to lunch at one of our favorite restaurants.

But I knew I was headed downhill.  I called my mommy from the restaurant and asked her to meet me at home as soon as she could because I was feeling lousy.  

She was there when we got home at 12:30.  I came in and laid down.  And she took over.  She is so amazing.

From upstairs in bed I could hear Tate laughing and squealing with joy.  He was so very happy to have someone playing with him constantly.  Because when I play with him, I play for 10 minutes then fold a load of laundry, play a bit more, then do some dishes etc.  He had a blast.  Lindsey showed up at some point and did what she does best...nap :)  

In the interim I texted with my old college roommate/sorority sister who's a physician in Dallas.  She had called in an antibiotic for me earlier in the morning as we thought I had a sinus infection.  By 5pm it was obvious this was much more because I had taken 3 more Advil at 3pm and my fever was 102.7.  She had me switch to Tylenol and ordered rest.  She was worried though; it was obvious.  The fact that my fever wasn't breaking was concerning.

My mom did most of Tate's bedtime routing, but I ended up putting him to sleep because he wouldn't relax for her, so I did my best to not breathe on him.  She slept with him that night and I slept in the room downstairs.  (I changed all sheets on our bed).

I was still absolutely miserable on Sunday.  Susan had told me to stay ahead of my fever, and to set my alarm to wake up overnight to take my Tylenol and to continue to do so.  So that's what I did.   With no relief.  My mom went grocery shopping for me and then I asked her to take Tate home with her with the promise to Tate that I would come pick him up later.

I never made it.

I was just so miserable.  My fever remained high and just sapped all my energy and I just felt awful.

Finally, I took myself to the ER right up the street at 6:30pm.  Yes, I went to the ER for a fever.

But I was so scared that something was seriously wrong with me.  And I could not fathom another night of misery not knowing what the hell was wrong with me.  I had already asked my sister to spend the night with me because I didn't want to be alone overnight.

I was in tears as I gave them my medical history.  My fever was 101.9.  And they were so kind as I sobbed.  

Then they swabbed my nose...unpleasant.

The doctor came in and told me "You have Flu A and Flu B."

I said "What?"  Then "Wait, what does that mean?"

He told me that I had both strains of the flu and that is very rare to get both strains at the same time.

Especially for someone who has had the damn flu shot.

And my child has not had the flu shot.

I was despondent.

Lindsey arrived to hold my hand, ok so she hung out in the doorway when I told her how sick I was, but she was there :)

I have to stay home until I am fever free for 24 hours without meds.  Heck I can't stay fever free with the medication.  I was put on Tamiflu and sent home to rest.

Lindsey ran around getting my meds at 8:00 at night, going to no less than 4 supposed 24 hour pharmacies.  My lovely neighbor had brought me some soup and bread earlier.  My best friend, Tate's godmother, brought me lunch and dinner tonight.  

And my parents.

My parents.

They have had Tate since yesterday and will have him all day tomorrow as well.  My dad drove all the way over here today to get Tate's meds and food and clothes.

I skyped with Tate around lunchtime and he was fine, but he looked at me beseechingly towards the end and wailed "I wanna go home."

Broke my heart.

My sweet boy.

We've never been apart more than overnight.  I usually drop him off around 3 on a Saturday and pick him up by 10 or 11 am on Sunday, so this is a long time for him, for me, for us.

But I gotta keep him safe.  He's unprotected by the flu shot.  And I cannot have him this miserable.

So tonight I've just taken another dose of Tylenol as my fever is 100.4, and I just took Tylenol about 45 minutes.  

So, I've got my prayer warriors praying for me and my sweet boy this Holy Week.  

As we head into Christ's passion, his death and resurrection I remember that "....by His stripes we are healed..." Isaiah 53:4 by my sweet friend S. who is among my prayer warriors lifting me up for healing and Tate for protection.

I also find it a bit comforting that as I turned on my television tonight, changing the channels and  turning up the volume, the first words I heard were from some television preacher.

What did I hear?

"By his stripes we are healed."  

My little boy and I...we're going to be just fine.  

But I sure do miss him.

You Thought Newborn Sleep Was Bad!!

It has been a long week.  A very long week.  Tate and I have struggled, and I mean struggled, especially with him going to sleep or more accurately staying in the bed.  Ugh.  It's just been awful.  Combined that with his intense clinginess lately and incessant whining and I'm about to go around the bend.   

We do still share a room and we've been sharing my bed since we returned from Ottawa.  I used to put him in his crib and he'd simply go to sleep.  Before we went on our trip, he was starting to climb out every now and again, but it wasn't a real problem.  Cue my mistake.  I should have made my displeasure a bit more obvious I suppose.  He would sometimes play in the crib for 30-45 minutes before falling asleep especially if he had taken a nap at daycare, but more often than not he wasn't napping at daycare.

Well not this week.  He napped every single day.  And bedtimes were a disaster.  I let him play until 7 instead of 6:30 most nights as I figured he wouldn't go to sleep until later, and there was no reason to prolong our agony.  Monday night he didn't go to sleep until 10.  10! Tuesday morning I had to wake him up at 6:30 making us rush in the  morning.  I just knew he wouldn't nap on Tuesday with the later wake-up.

Nope.  He napped!  Up until 9:30 Tuesday night.

But this isn't the worst of it.  The worst was trying to get him to stay in the bed.  O.M.G.  I have never been so frustrated.  I tried the whole Super Nanny approach of outwardly 'calmly' taking back to the bedroom and not speaking to him.  10 times later and I opted to let my inner feelings be known.  I threatened.  I yelled.  I stomped around.  He lost 4 trains and a coloring book.  All to no avail.  Finally, he was asleep like I said at 10 and 9:30 with me laying beside him.

I went shopping Wednesday and prepared a sticker chart.  Actually a train sticker chart.  I bought some Cat in the Hat stickers and I bought a few cheap toys.  I told him if he stayed in the bed he could put one sticker on one train car and he could pick out one toy.  He saw the toys and knew exactly what he wanted.

Wednesday night I put him in bed and laid down with him like I always have (I just usually put him in the crib after a few minutes).  He asked me to leave because he needed to stay in the bed so he could get his new train toy in the morning, so it seemed he had the concept.  Mind you this was at 8:30 already.  I came on downstairs and all was silent for a good long while.  And then I heard the door open and there was Tate!  Quiet and thoughtful.  I took him back to bed and reminded him he'd just lost his special toy.  Five minutes later he returned.  I put him back in the bed and sat in the rocker next to the bed, turned the rocker around and rocked and fell asleep myself.  Around 9:15 I turned back around and he was asleep.  Same thing last night.  He was keen on staying in bed, but he simply could not do it.  After the second pop-up I again got in the rocker and turned away from him.  He was asleep by 9.

He woke up this morning at 5:56, so he didn't have nearly enough sleep.  The whining began in earnest, and he refused to go back to sleep, making for a very long, EARLY morning for me.  I refused to let him watch his precious train on my phone, and I refused to get out of bed.

At 6:24 he came up to me and told me his pants were wet.  Yep.  He had peed.  On himself.  My child who knows exactly how to take himself to the bathroom located in the room we sleep in.  He tends to do this when he's mad at me which infuriates me to no end, because I know it's purposeful.  I told him to take his pants off and he'd have to be cold.  More whining.  

I finally got up about 10 minutes and gave him some new bottoms to put on;  I'm not a total meanie.  He climbed up into bed with me (with freezing cold feet!), but we only cuddled about 5 minutes, thus our day began.

So with his not falling asleep until 9 or 10 I get no downtime.  I rush around cleaning up after he goes to bed late.  Luckily I've always prepared his lunch when I clean up our dinner dishes, so if nothing else gets done we are ready for the following day.  I don't always eat dinner with him, so a couple of nights I was eating cheese and crackers seemingly at 9:30.  

I'm just exhausted.

My sister thinks he needs his own room and that should alleviate some of this.  Though I agree he needs his own room, and I'm actually in the process of getting him a mattress for converting his crib to the double bed and getting the decor together, I wonder if that's really going to make a difference or make it worse.  We shall see.

My plan for now is to sit in the rocker for 2-3 more nights as he goes to sleep.  Then I shall move to sit in my fainting couch which is a bit farther away. Then I'll sit by the door for a few days, then in the doorway.  Then just outside the door with it closed for a few days.

Because I think he's simply worried I'm going to leave.

Hopefully this will help alleviate this concern for my sweet boy.

Tonight, however I rocked his cute little bum to sleep since he didn't nap today!!!  I knew if I rocked him he would be asleep within minutes at a very reasonable time.  And I was right.  He was out at 7:30.  I probably could have done the rocking chair thing and let him go to sleep on his own, but I simply didn't have it in me tonight.  

So I rocked my 3y7m old to sleep.  

It was lovely.

St. Patrick's Day Weekend!

It was another quick weekend for us as I had to work on Friday (I know, I know...I'm EXTREMELY lucky to have most Fridays off!)

So here's our weekend pretty much in pictures...

Saturday started off with our last Prelude Music class (Music Together).  We've been going since Tate was 5 months old (January 2010).  We have done every instrument I believe at this point.  There was a 6-8 month period when we did Gymboree instead, but we quickly returned to Prelude.  We've so enjoyed our classes, and I know that Tate, though he may not remember going, will always carry the music in his soul.  Forever, he and I will be bound by "Hello Everybody, we're so glad to see you!!!"  He ended the class with much joy.
 


















We headed off to Nordstrom for me to do a return.  I then opted to do a bit of shopping for ME, as he was in a great mood!  As I was trying stuff on, at one point he looked at me and said "Wow Mommy you look like a princess!"  That shirt was put in the 'yes' pile without me even looking at the tag.  He did really well, and I shopped for about a little over an hour.  About 45 minutes he did get tired, so I became one of those mothers, and I gave him my phone to watch his precious trains while he continued to sit happily in his stroller.  I even had time to run down to the first floor and get some new make-up!!  He even gave up the phone when we rode the elevator down and was great about that 10 minutes tacked onto our 70 minute shopping spree!

In the dressing room!

We had a later than usual lunch at Barnaby's which was yummy as always!

We came home with the intent of no nap! (Shocking I know!  But he goes to bed WAY too late if he naps now!)  I turned on the tv to let him watch 3 episodes of 'Curious George.' And I dozed on the couch!!  It was WONDERFUL!!  I never truly fell asleep, but I got to rest, while my kid watched a bit of tv, which after 2 episodes he stopped and started playing.  He then decided I should be part of his play and commenced bouncing around on me on the sofa.   I wasn't a fan, so up I got and we got ready to go to the Music Together Concert in one of our local parks.

 This morning we made it to church, and the service was just lovely.  We did our weekly shopping and returned home to have some lunch.  Tate played and played with his trains while I prepared a couple of meals for the week, got his snacks and fruit chopped and packaged for the week, did two loads of laundry, cleaned up a bit, got his bags ready for the week (nap mat, water bottle, extra clothes).  Then we headed off to one of my girlfriend's for a puppet show she and her husband won at an auction.  Tate had a blast.  It's ridiculously warm here, so shorts weather has begun and it's time to break out the sunscreen again!  St. Patrick's Day seems to have brought out the comedian in Tate, though the sticking out of the tongue for pictures seems to be his new favorite passtime.  Sigh.

This is some kind of dance move, I suppose.

No idea what that lip move is!

Yummy vegan cake from Whole Foods.
There were cupcakes, so I had to bring
this egg-free cake for sweet Tate!

There's Ollie, K's labradoodle.  Yes, he is as
big as a small pony!!