School House Rock

The past 4 months I feel like I have been under a rock.  The School House Rock to be exact.

For Tate will be entering kindergarten in 7 short months.

In SEVEN months.

I cannot believe that my sweet boy, my dream, my joy, my love will be 5 years old and going to kindergarten.  Five years ago this week I had just finished watching Barack Obama be inaugurated as our 44th president; our first black president.  I was almost 3 months pregnant at the time.  Pregnant.  

Now that little wisp of life is here walking, talking, laughing, crying, smiling, loving life.  

And he's learning.  In leaps and bounds.  And this learning business is about to get serious with the start of kindergarten.  We've so enjoyed his time at his current little daycare/school.  They play and play and play and learn and learn and learn.  They learn about God, they've learned how to read, how to count, how to color, how to love, how to cry, how to live and love it.  And Tate loves to learn.  Loves it.

That's what I want to continue.  I want him to love learning.  I want him to ask questions, to sit back and absorb what he's seeing and doing, to listen to other ways of getting to the same answer.  I want him to appreciate those who've come before him, those who've paved the way.  I want him to flourish, be nurtured, be loved and love, be cared about and most importantly be safe and happy.

So I've spent the past 4 months struggling to decide where to send him to elementary school in the fall.  The elementary school we are zoned to is not one I feel comfortable sending Tate to.  There are several reasons for this....More than 50% of the student population has limited English speaking skills.  90% of the children qualify for free/reduced lunch.  90% of the student population is Hispanic with only 6% being black.  Only 10% of the students are recognized as gifted and talented.   80% of the children are considered at risk.  Worse, their test scores are poor.

Writing that all down I feel like a terrible person.  So here's my thought process:  Tate speaks no Spanish;  I speak no Spanish.  He won't be able to communicate with more than half the kids.  I don't know this for sure, but I fathom a guess that the percentage of parents who speak English well will be way less than half.  How am I to build a community in my child's school when I can't converse with the other parents?  Tate has never been around anyone who speaks Spanish, and I'm sure he would catch on, but should he have to?  Why does he need to learn another language in order to make friends in addition to everything else he's going to be learning?

Then there's the whole socio-economic problem.  I do not want my child ostracized further for being considered 'a have.'  We live in a neighborhood that is changing before our very eyes, which is why I bought this house in 2003.  I knew that as the neighborhood changed the value of my home would improve, though I didn't ever consider what having a child in this neighborhood would be like.  Hindsight...  In any event, the differences in our lifestyles would be marked.  I do not want Tate thinking he's better than anyone else, and I don't want others thinking he thinks that.  I'm blessed to be able to provide Tate with all that we do and have, and I don't want to feel bad for that.  It would be hard to invite people to do activities with us, go to dinner with us, have playdates at places with us that they couldn't afford.  I don't want to be any more of an outsider than we already would be because of the color of our skin.

Six percent of students last year were black.  Just 6%.  Tate would likely be an only in many of his classes.  In fact, less than 1% of the students were bi-racial, so he would be an only.  I don't want that.

Only 10% are gifted and talented.  That's a really low number.  Now, I have no idea if Tate is GT (he's being tested next Saturday), but if he is I don't feel he'll get the attention he'll need, the differentiation in the class.  It doesn't seem like all the teachers are gifted and talented certified either, so he'll have even fewer options.  I also worry that he won't be challenged whether he's gifted or not because he is a smart boy.   I don't want him left to his own devices possibly because the teacher feels 'Well he gets it, so I'm going to focus on those who aren't quite there yet', and then he's bored.  I certainly can't say that's what would happen, and I'm sure they would assure me that wouldn't, but I'm not comfortable with the inadvertent possibilities.

I simply don't like the school.  I don't feel like he or I will fit in.  And though I lament the time when you simply sent your kid to school down the street, those times have passed.  At least they've passed for those of us who live in the city.  

Luckily we have choices.  

Choices.

Way too many choices.....

But that's a post for another day.