Time: 8:16am
Date: Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Place: My office at work
Key Players: Me. 45 1/2 year old single mother by choice to 3y8m old son. Oh yeah- pediatric dentist.
Dr. B.T. 28 year old single, female, newly graduated pediatric dentist as of June 2013.
Conversation: Dr. B.T.: What did you do last night Dr. C?
Me from inside my office: (confused as to who she is talking to) Me?
Dr. B. T.: Uh huh
Me: Ummmm...Hmmmmm.
(I could not think of one thing to say that would sound interesting or exciting. :) I wondered what she thinks I do with my 3 year old in the evenings...run to the movies? go to the mall? It's patently obvious I don't put him in a jog stroller and run 303597 miles every night...I mean just look at me. Hit the bars on a Tuesday night; even in my single days I waited until at least Wednesday nights to troll happy hours and the bars.)
Me: Oh just normal Tate and me stuff...dinner, dishes, laundry, bathtime, stories, cajoling, consoling, rocking, laying down with, reminding of staying in bed, cleaning up, packing.
I didn't even have the heart to ask what she did.
I remember being 28; well I was in dental school at 28. I remember being 33, single, female, cute :), fun-loving and working full time making good money. Oh I remember.
And sometimes I miss it. I miss deciding to randomly go hang out with some girlfriends. I remember calling someone on the way home and saying let's go get a drink. I miss having the nights to myself. And I think it's ok to miss all that. I miss the pure joy of really enjoying MY life.
But goodness now I enjoy MY life and this little boy's life.
I wouldn't have missed this for the world. So, tomorrow if she asks me what I did tonight, I'm gonna say 'I played with my little boy, ate dinner with him, put him to bed after lots of hugs and kisses, and I wouldn't change a thing. I wouldn't have missed one minute of the 2 hours we spent together last night no matter how tired I was after work, no matter how many times I had to tell him to stop doing something he shouldn't be doing, no matter how frustrated I got when he fought going to sleep.
Because one day, like those days when I miss all the things I did as a single person...
One day I'm gonna miss THIS.
4 comments:
It's weird, missing parts of single life, and yet being so happy with the all the great stuff that comes along with being a parent that you're ok with missing single life.
Very weird. But I feel exactly the same way.
Well said! Agree totally...though I don't really miss single life. I miss sleep. I miss sleeping when I want for as long as I want. So I'll take what I've got, every second with Elena because I'll have plenty of opportunity to sleep when she's grown.
So sweet! Totally agree with everything you said. I wistfully walked by a Mexican restaurant/bar tonight on my way to pick Rowan up and thought I am running a little early, maybe I should just swing in and have a margarita while I respond to emails....but instead, I headed to daycare and got to participate in the dress up day parade with my little girl. A much more meaningful way to spend my time for sure.
I love that song. And I love this post. I completely agree! It's rare for teacher colleagues to ask about weeknight evenings BUT people do ask me about weekends. as in "Are you doing anything this weekend?" Or "What did you do all weekend?" Ummm, I'm a single, working mom of two little boys with a house and big yard. Did I do anything? Ahhhh, yes. And I kept doing it until I collapsed on the couch at 9:30. LOL!
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