But for a few different decisions in my life he wouldn't be here. As I've sat here tonight I've given that so much thought. From what if I had not gone to Australia for those 2 weeks? What if I hadn't have spoken up and asked Christian and Raik if they wanted to join Tammy and me for dinner that last night in Cairns? What if I wasn't a pediatric dentist making a very decent living which afforded me to take that trip to Australia? What if I had decided to not tell Christian about my plans to have a baby on my own until after I had been inseminated by an anonymous donor? What if he hadn't been generous enough to offer to donate? What if he hadn't of been brave enough to fly halfway across the world to get to know a girl he had only spent 8 hours with 10 months prior? What if we hadn't have hit it off while he was here that August? And what if I hadn't have been so lucky as to get pregnant that very first time I tried?!
It's mind boggling. How one misstep or maybe just a different step would lead all of us on different paths with different people. That knowledge definitely makes life seem so much more fragile.
I'm so happy. This little boy is the light of my life. Sometimes the light dims when I'm stressed, worried and tired as I have been this week, but it never goes out. He's my constant. His laughs, his giggles, and oh my the things he says!! My little talker! I'm so very proud. I'm so very thankful. I'm so very happy.
One day I'll write his birth story along with the story of how I met Christian and how we got me pregnant because those stories are an integral part of who Tate is, who I have become, who Christian has become to me and who we will all be together.
Happy 23 Month Birthday Sweet Boy!
3 comments:
This is a beautiful post. I think about all those "what-ifs" in my life too. How I never imagined I would be in this place back when I was in my twenties and much of my thirties. How if I hadn't decided to go back to college and then again for my master's degree, I'd never be able to do this. Both our stories remind me of the lyrics to "Bless the Broken Road". May God continue to bless your family.
Nice post! What a blessing he is! Enjoy!
Hi Jennifer. Thanks for dropping by and commenting on my blog. It is great to know there are lots of us out there even if we can't actually meet each other any other way than online. ;-)
This was a lovely post. I too could have chosen different roads along the way but I feel I did what I did because I was supposed to end up right here. And I'm also very glad that I chose the education I did because I certainly wouldn't be able to do this on my own without it.
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